I have always wanted to be a tough guy.
When I was growing up, my tough guy heroes were Clint Eastwood, James Bond, Charles Bronson, Steve McQueen and Mad Max. Of these tough guy archetypes, Clint Eastwood (in his westerns) was my favorite. Squinty look. Small cigar. Seven-day chin stubble. Low-crowned, wide-brim cowboy hat. Hand resting on his six-shooter. Memorable lines that rival anything Shakespeare ever wrote. Lines such as “There are two kinds of people, my friend, those with loaded guns and those who dig.”
But I have never been a tough guy. No friend or work colleague has ever said, “You are one tough guy John. Maybe tougher than Dirty Harry.”
That is about to change. I have decided to cease being a nice guy and become one tougher than the toughest nails guy.
There are different types of tough guys. Lee Marvin was no nonsense. James Bond was charming and lethal. Mad Max was a survivor. They could all serve as great tough guy role models. But I am sticking with my hero Clint Eastood, particularly in his memorable roles in a series of “spaghetti westerns.” (I am sure that you believe, as I do, that “The Good, the Bad and the Ugly” is one of greatest movies of all time. It certainly had a great song.)
What made Clint tough?
- He didn’t talk much but when he did, he was direct and his words mattered. Sometimes he showed us that silence says more than words.
- He had great self-control.
- He was calm under pressure.
- He was very competent.
- He didn’t beg for respect, he expected it.
- He had a strong physical presence. Moving deliberately. Maintaining eye contact (even when squinting).
- He was principled. He had a strong sense of right and wrong.
- He didn’t need to prove that he was tough. He exhibited quiet authority.
There is more to being a tough guy than the above.
I have noticed that none of my tough guy heroes wear shorts. You have never seen Steve McQueen or Charles Bronson in shorts. No more shorts for me.
In addition, tough guys don’t smile, although James Bond would smirk. One reviewer of the Mad Max movie Fury Road noted that, over the course of the entire movie, “Mad Max smiles once—a faint, almost imperceptible smirk—toward the end when Furiosa is being hailed by the people.”
My smiling days are over.
I can do the above. It may take some practice, but I suspect that I can be a tough guy by the end of the year. I’ll have to practice my smirk. And it may take me a while to get the tough guy squinting down. I want to avoid looking like I need a change in my eyeglass prescription when I squint. That look would detract from my hard-earned image.