The Bug Invasion
Laura, Julia, and Krista spent part of the night in a tent in the backyard. Around midnight they decided that they had had enough of roughing it.
Bugs, too many bugs.
Bugs, in the eyes of a kid, seem to have a single purpose, during their brief lives, of torturing kids. With science having figured out how to reduce the ability of bugs to cause disease and ravage crops, bugs seem to have increased their focus on kids. I can imagine the bug strategic planning sessions with lots of charts showing downward trends of plague and crop opportunities next to graphs showing increases in the number of kids worldwide.
I also share some of the blame for their abbreviated evening.
In my role of educating them, I forgot to tell them that if they closed the screen doors on the tent, and kept them closed, they would reduce the ability of bugs to bother them.
Jessica had the soccer ball at her feet. The field in front of her was wide open.
I don’t know how the ball got there. I don’t recall a pass. Jessica did not appear to know how the ball got there. She stared at it briefly, seemingly stunned by its sudden appearance as if it had mysteriously popped out of the ground offered up by a ball-stealing mole.
“Run Jessica!” screamed the parents.
Perhaps she heard us. Perhaps she knew what to do with a ball and a wide-open field. Perhaps she ran from the ball-stealing mole.
She ran.
Kicking the ball. Zigging and zagging as her less than skillful kicking caused the ball to wander off a straight line.
The opposing goalie had settled into a crouch. Motionless. Jessica running. Ball zigging. Minutes seemed to pass by.
Parents screaming “Go!” “Score!” Goalie motionless.
Too motionless. Perhaps, it wasn’t a goalie at all but rather a mannequin. Perhaps the kid was racked with the largest adrenaline surge that had ever surged through her body. Perhaps, the kid was the most experienced nine-year-old goalie in the world and knew that she didn’t have to move until Jessica got closer. Perhaps, the kid saw the mole chasing Jessica and the ball and was terrified by the scene.
The goalie stayed in her crouch as Jessica kicked the ball and it lazily rolled into the goal.
Crowd screaming, startling the goalie. Goalie finally moving, shaking her head. Jessica dancing in a wild motion that involved whirling her arms over her head. Her teammates rushing toward her.
A glance at and a smile towards her father. Good for you kid.
The Insight of a Child
Theresa told me that the reason she doesn’t remember much from when she was a baby is that “My head was too small.” The kid is going to be a scientist.
She also told me that a person becomes an adult when they are 18.
Why do you think that? I asked.
Because then you can order stuff from the shopping networks on TV, she replied. Perhaps a more pragmatic right to be an adult than voting or being able to buy beer.
My Limited Crafts Skills
Julia’s school play, HMS Pinafore, opens next weekend. This weekend has two four-hour practice sessions. Denise is rushing to complete the costume needed; that of “A Military Relative.”
Julia wisely picked her mother to create the necessary costume. Her father would have cut a head and arm holes in a hefty bag and painted “A Military Costume” on the front of the bag (probably in orange) lest there be any confusion about the costume.
Julia is also making a Mayan Pyramid, for school, out of cake. Seven layers of cake, covered with brown frosting. Today we will shellac the cake.
Perhaps because I am a boy or perhaps because my imagination is limited but I never would have thought of constructing a pyramid out of cake. Clay, wood, or paper mâché would have occurred to me. Flour would not.
Shellacking a cake will be an interesting process with an uncertain outcome. Certainly, a first for me.